Funny Japanese Porn Moments: My Favorite Picks

I think it goes without saying that there are a hell of a lot of weird and wonderful things that come out of Japan: today, I’m going to explore the funny and freaky side of their porn industry.

Japan has always been one of my favorite go-to spots for great porn (I love hot Japanese pornstars) – it’s just the fact that it’s so unique and unlike what we have in Western countries. You find things there that blow our minds and yes: they really do have an eye for funny inventions, angles and so on. Oh, and to boot, the women are absolutely fucking HOT! What’s not to love about hunting down the wildest porn that Japan has to offer? Well today, I’m going to explore bits of the industry that aren’t exactly sexy, but certainly enjoyable in other ways. Yes: I’m looking for the funniest parts of Japanese porn, because nothing beats beating your meat and giggling at the same time. So, without further ado – let’s look at Mr. Porn Geek’s top picks for porn weirdness straight from Japan.

Finish Her!

In a crossover between Mortal Combat and fucking, what we see here is a man that has mastered the cumshot. This is a finishing move and one that, quite frankly, I don’t think will be bested any time soon. What’s especially enjoyable about this particular scene is that it’s just so goddamn Japanese. I mean, if one object reminds you of their porn, it has to be the lube-covered silver inflatable mattress, right? They go hand in hand like nothing else, and it’s great to see the inventiveness of the modern Japanese porn star. When you’re ready to bust, just pull back, load up, slide on in and unleash! The oily surface makes for a quick glide and ensures that you’re not going to be left with friction burns once the jizz starts pumping. Oh, and if you’re keen to see the whole video, you can watch it here. It’s hosted by our friends on Kiss JAV – also known as ShyAV or JAVFun. Want to learn more? Check out the Kiss JAV review here.

Unique Sushi Dish

Look, I’ve been to some pretty weird sushi places over the years, but I don’t think for a second that I’d want to go to this particular spot. I’m not sure why they’re cooking up cock, or why the girl sitting down here doesn’t realize what’s going on, but that’s not raw fish, sweetie! She’ll realize sooner rather than later that something is wrong with her dish when it delivers some very salty Kewpie mayo! This is only the first course too – legend has it that a weird brown scallop of some description was next up. It’s alleged to make some pretty weird noises and expels toxic gas whenever it gets scared. It’s also said that after this video went live in Japan, the number of men applying for a job at the joint increased 9001% – who would have guessed so many dudes were keen to switch professions entirely to become masters of sushi?

Card Game Fucking

I’ll be honest with you: I have zero idea what card game they’re playing here – all I know is that some chick is getting fucked during the middle of the game and this is about as amateur as it gets for gangbangs over there. I’ll be honest – I love poker – but can’t that wait until you’re done running a train on a slut that wants to give up her holes to you and your friends? I suppose it’s possible that the two dudes 0n either side that aren’t servicing a hole are gay, but still – just wait until she’s finished and then get to playing. What’s crazy is the fact that they’re playing a game that looks to be pretty intense and requires a lot of focus – what’s going on there, exactly? You can see that she’s not even playing herself either, which seems pretty unfair if you ask me. Oh and, sorry to the dude on the right, but you’re literally the stereotype of a typical Japanese dude. I’m not envious of that little peanut, that’s for sure!

Japanese Lunch Time

One thing I know about Japan is that when it comes to working hours, those guys are absolutely hounded by their bosses. Sometimes, you’ve got to make do with what you’ve got – this is exactly why I think this situation has come to pass. Now, you might think that this scene comes from a porn video, but it’s actually just how things run in Japan these days. These high flying business dudes are so obsessed with getting the numbers that they’ll do whatever it takes to put in 16-hour days. That’s not to say they don’t fuck, though – when lunch rolls around, they try to multitask as much as possible and yes, that includes acting upon their desire to make babies. If you thought you day was busy, just imagine having to do this when you want to get your misses knocked up all while holding down a job!

Bench Press Fucking

Would you consider this extreme motivation or just straight-up distraction? I’m torn here, because on the one hand, if I’m going for a 1 RM, I think that a girl can stop until I’ve actually completed the rep before she rewards me. However, if the deal is I’m allowed to rep pretty low weights while she pleasures my cock, that seems like a fair deal, and I’m going to go as slow as possible, with as little weight as possible, to maximize my gains and my sexual pleasure. What do you think, guys? All I know is that if this happened at my gym, I’d probably go a hell of a lot more often. My gym in Chinatown is already packed to the gills with hot and delicious Asian girls I want to destroy – if they come at me like that while I’m pounding away at the weights, that’s all the motivation I need to keep going back every week! If you’re a fan of chicks who happen to be sporty, be sure to visit the HardBodies subreddit.

Phone Distraction

Ever heard of phones being distracting? Me too! Turns out that this girl is so addicted to her mobile that she doesn’t notice, well, the guy taking advantage of her and her schoolgirl holes. What is it about Japan, sex, public transport and schoolgirls? There are thousands of these types of videos and it seems insane to me that there’s such a big market for it. As I say: those guys over there are pretty weird and will do anything for a good time. Glad that’s not my daughter on the train!

If you want to enjoy more fantastic porn straight from Japan and other fantastic Eastern countries, check out my favorite premium Asian websites!