The Horny Games

The Horny Games: Mr. Porn Geek’s review

I’ve heard of The Hunger Games, but never The Horny Games – will this title be anything close to its namesake and alleged parody source? That’s the topic of today’s review, which will be focused on a porn game Mr. Porn Geek actually hasn’t come across before. I decided that I’d come into this review completely blind and yeah – I think I’m going to enjoy what I come across. So with that in mind, how about we try out The Horny Games and see what the experience here is actually like? I’m excited and from what I’ve seen thus far, it could be great. Still, I want to do my full, high IQ analysis and coverage, so continue reading and let’s see what the deal is at The Horny Games.

First thoughts on The Horny Games

When loading up The Horny Games for the first time, you’ll see that the splash here features what I’d consider to be quite a minimal approach to initial gameplay experiences. There’s a disclaimer at the bottom detailing the ages of the characters involved, a small logo in the middle of the screen and then the option to ‘play’ or check out more games from the same studio. While the second button is a nice one to have, I honestly don’t have much to go with here aside from pressing ‘play’. Mr. Porn Geek is pretty old-school and actually likes having the ability to mute games and fiddle with some other settings before I get into them, so a little bit of a drawback from the get go, but I don’t think it’s going to be the end of the world.

Playing The Horny Games

After hitting play, you’ll learn that the game is based around a TV show that doesn’t have very good ratings, owing to the fact that sponsors are going to different districts and no one’s tuning in to what you have to offer. The blonde guy seems like a pretty sleazy executive – I hope he ends up getting killed before the end of the game! I know that sounds quite violent, but it’s what makes my cock nice and hard. Anyhow, continue on through the text by hitting the green ‘play’ triangle: you’ll be told that the competition is putting out pretty lewd material and that in order to complete, you’re going to have to, you know, get a little bit blue. It’s at this point that I realize Mr. Blonde is actually talking to a female character – you can see her side profile silhouette in the foreground! Can’t believe I missed that at the start of the game, but I suppose it’s because the writing is so engaging and high quality.

She’s asked to perform an ‘easy strip’, although says that she has a better idea instead. Since the name of this title is The Horny Games, I’m hoping that things get slightly more X-rated as a result of the suggestion. Turns out old green eyes is instantly being fucked in front of the camera – first in her pussy, but then that’s able to be upgraded to the ass after the rating bar is high enough. Do note that you’ll have to pick up the pace of the pussy though – I guess the fans at home really like seeing quick, hole-pounding action.

Continued fun at The Horny Games

What makes me laugh about this game is the fact that they’re getting instant ratings reactions – I don’t think that’s how the TV industry works. Still, after her ass was fully fucked and the ratings hit 100, the executive then has the ability to bust a nut – for whatever reason, this is a facial instead of a rear-entrance creampie. The Horny Games let me down in this regard: I wanted to see that cock unleash hell in her butthole. After being told that this really worked and everyone loved it, you’ve just got the option to replay the game … and that’s it! The Horny Games is one of the shortest adult titles I’ve played in recent months. It’s very much a sex simulation tool as opposed to a fully-fledged game!

My criticisms of The Horny Games

I actually like giving suggestions to games when I feel like they let me down, so let’s go ahead here and talk a little bit about what The Horny Games does right and what it goes wrong. On the surface level, the minimal amount of content is obviously an issue – there are no two ways about it, you’ve got to have more scenes and a better story here! If not that, make sure that the sex simulation is the central piece – give me more sex options (such as handjobs, blowjobs and whatever else) as well as complete control over what the broad I look like. Mr. Porn Geek gets tired of this one-dimensional approach to XXX entertainment in games: I want to change the tit size, skin tone, hair color and outfit! Don’t just put me into a scene where a chick is getting fucked and I had literally zero control over it.

The Horny Games: my conclusion

The building blocks of The Horny Games are there – I just don’t quite get why it has this very narrow scope and focus. You’ll spend an equal amount of time reading text about the game instead of enjoying the hardcore fucking. I’m quite disappointed with this approach and I know that plenty of you sports racers at home are going to feel the same way. Customization is key and if this game has none, I don’t think I can – in good faith – give a recommendation for you to try it out. It might be okay if you just want a quick jerk-off session to some animated cartoon fucking, but that’s not much of a game and there are plenty of games out there that do it a lot better. So yeah – The Horny Games isn’t getting my recommendation here. Try out one of the dozens of other titles I’ve written about instead: they’re much better for squeezing your hog over.